When I Surrender
Page 28
“Whatever you want,” I murmured, hoping I wasn’t doing something wrong.
His thumb stroked my cheek as he gazed down at me. “I like it tight, I just don’t want to hurt you.”
I was prepared for a little discomfort. “It’s okay. I’m fine.” I was a mess of nerves and my inner muscles trembled in anticipation, but I wanted this. I wanted him. Knox better not back out on me now. I couldn’t have another failed attempt at losing my virginity. Using his hand to guide himself, Knox pressed harder, penetrating me, stealing the oxygen from my lungs, waking me up from the inside out. With his eyes locked on mine, he thrust deeper, several more inches slicing me open. My mouth dropped open in a silent scream.
With my body stretched to accommodate him, Knox moved slowly, using long measured strokes that I felt deep inside me – in a place no one had ever touched me before. But what I really savored was the look in his eyes. The way he was looking at me made my heart race and my body respond despite the pain. He was a man in need, dark hunger reflected back at me in his features. A warm shiver raced along my body.
I felt stretched to capacity, the sensation entirely new and slightly painful, but in the best possible way. Still, I didn’t like the idea that Knox was holding back. I wanted to show him that I wasn’t afraid of his dark side, that I could take whatever he wanted to give. Wrapping my legs around his back, I urged him closer. He released a guttural groan and buried his face against my neck. “More, Knox,” I murmured. He obeyed, his hips slamming into me, forcing a cry to rip from my throat.
Knox
I worried for a moment that my weight was crushing her, but when McKenna’s legs wound around my back, I lost all sense of rational thought. She squirmed beneath me, begging for more, and unrestrained need raced through my veins. Done holding back, I pounded into her tight channel without mercy. She cried out, all her muscles tightening around me.
A pang of guilt sucker punched me in the gut. I should be gentle with her, but that wasn’t my style and I let my raw need to consume her overtake me. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” she exhaled against my mouth, and I kissed her deeply, relief washing through me.
This might not have been my first time, but nothing about this was familiar to me. Sharing this with her meant something. It wasn’t like all the other times when my mind shut down and I lost myself to the numbness of pleasure. I was aware of everything. Every heartbeat, every cry of pleasure, her hot breath rushing over my skin, the pull of her warm channel hugging me. She was intoxicating in the most sobering way.
I knew I was getting close, and since there was no way I was going off before her, I used the pad of my index finger to circle her clit and bent forward to kiss her br**sts, latching onto one of her ni**les and grazing it lightly with my teeth. McKenna shuddered in my arms, crying out in pleasure rather than pain this time. I pumped into her with long, measured strokes, continuing to pleasure her, and soon felt her body clench around mine with her climax. I held her while little tremors passed through her body, slowing my pace to allow her to enjoy every pulse and sensation. That certainly hadn’t happened the last time I was with a virgin. I remember her begging me to just finish and the blood stains on her sheets when we were done. Back then I’d been in high school, though, and not nearly as skilled and unfortunately not as in-tune with a woman’s pleasure. But with McKenna, that wasn’t an option. I was tuned in to her every breath.
Moments later, I lost myself inside her, gripping her ass and letting her milk every last drop of fluid from my body. I clung to her long after, each of us unwilling to let the other go.
Sex had never been like that before. I would have been up and out the door the minute I got off. With McKenna, I reluctant to let her go even to remove the condom.
“Did I hurt you?” I asked.
She shook her head, curling against me.
She was so quiet, I worried I’d done something wrong and guilt churned inside me. “How do you feel?”
“Happy,” she answered.
Releasing a sigh, I pulled her into my arms, drawing her even closer. “Not too sore?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
Relief washed over me. I knew I should apologize, I was too rough with her, but it was who I was, and if she wasn’t complaining, then neither was I.
“Was everything okay for you?” she whispered.
I tipped her chin up to meet my eyes. “That’s what you’re worried about? That I didn’t enjoy myself?” I fought back a smile while she nodded up at me. “It was perfect.” I pressed a tender kiss to her mouth, hoping that quieted all her fears about not measuring up. There was nothing to measure up to, with McKenna occupying all of my brain space I couldn’t have recalled a previous partner if I tried.
We lay together as the room grew dark around us. Never in my life had I savored a quiet moment quite like this one. McKenna’s head rested on my shoulder, her tangled hair splayed on the pillow between us, and her warm, soft body molded to mine. A monogamous healthy sexual relationship was completely foreign to me. And knowing this beautiful, sweet girl trusted me made my heart beat erratically. She believed in me when no one else did. She saw the man I hoped I could become.
My brothers would be home soon and I knew we needed to get up and get dressed, I just didn’t want to. “Are you hungry?” I asked finally. We’d skipped dinner and gone straight for dessert. The least I could do now was feed her.
“Why, are you going to cook for me?” The hint of a smile tugged at her mouth.
His thumb stroked my cheek as he gazed down at me. “I like it tight, I just don’t want to hurt you.”
I was prepared for a little discomfort. “It’s okay. I’m fine.” I was a mess of nerves and my inner muscles trembled in anticipation, but I wanted this. I wanted him. Knox better not back out on me now. I couldn’t have another failed attempt at losing my virginity. Using his hand to guide himself, Knox pressed harder, penetrating me, stealing the oxygen from my lungs, waking me up from the inside out. With his eyes locked on mine, he thrust deeper, several more inches slicing me open. My mouth dropped open in a silent scream.
With my body stretched to accommodate him, Knox moved slowly, using long measured strokes that I felt deep inside me – in a place no one had ever touched me before. But what I really savored was the look in his eyes. The way he was looking at me made my heart race and my body respond despite the pain. He was a man in need, dark hunger reflected back at me in his features. A warm shiver raced along my body.
I felt stretched to capacity, the sensation entirely new and slightly painful, but in the best possible way. Still, I didn’t like the idea that Knox was holding back. I wanted to show him that I wasn’t afraid of his dark side, that I could take whatever he wanted to give. Wrapping my legs around his back, I urged him closer. He released a guttural groan and buried his face against my neck. “More, Knox,” I murmured. He obeyed, his hips slamming into me, forcing a cry to rip from my throat.
Knox
I worried for a moment that my weight was crushing her, but when McKenna’s legs wound around my back, I lost all sense of rational thought. She squirmed beneath me, begging for more, and unrestrained need raced through my veins. Done holding back, I pounded into her tight channel without mercy. She cried out, all her muscles tightening around me.
A pang of guilt sucker punched me in the gut. I should be gentle with her, but that wasn’t my style and I let my raw need to consume her overtake me. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” she exhaled against my mouth, and I kissed her deeply, relief washing through me.
This might not have been my first time, but nothing about this was familiar to me. Sharing this with her meant something. It wasn’t like all the other times when my mind shut down and I lost myself to the numbness of pleasure. I was aware of everything. Every heartbeat, every cry of pleasure, her hot breath rushing over my skin, the pull of her warm channel hugging me. She was intoxicating in the most sobering way.
I knew I was getting close, and since there was no way I was going off before her, I used the pad of my index finger to circle her clit and bent forward to kiss her br**sts, latching onto one of her ni**les and grazing it lightly with my teeth. McKenna shuddered in my arms, crying out in pleasure rather than pain this time. I pumped into her with long, measured strokes, continuing to pleasure her, and soon felt her body clench around mine with her climax. I held her while little tremors passed through her body, slowing my pace to allow her to enjoy every pulse and sensation. That certainly hadn’t happened the last time I was with a virgin. I remember her begging me to just finish and the blood stains on her sheets when we were done. Back then I’d been in high school, though, and not nearly as skilled and unfortunately not as in-tune with a woman’s pleasure. But with McKenna, that wasn’t an option. I was tuned in to her every breath.
Moments later, I lost myself inside her, gripping her ass and letting her milk every last drop of fluid from my body. I clung to her long after, each of us unwilling to let the other go.
Sex had never been like that before. I would have been up and out the door the minute I got off. With McKenna, I reluctant to let her go even to remove the condom.
“Did I hurt you?” I asked.
She shook her head, curling against me.
She was so quiet, I worried I’d done something wrong and guilt churned inside me. “How do you feel?”
“Happy,” she answered.
Releasing a sigh, I pulled her into my arms, drawing her even closer. “Not too sore?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
Relief washed over me. I knew I should apologize, I was too rough with her, but it was who I was, and if she wasn’t complaining, then neither was I.
“Was everything okay for you?” she whispered.
I tipped her chin up to meet my eyes. “That’s what you’re worried about? That I didn’t enjoy myself?” I fought back a smile while she nodded up at me. “It was perfect.” I pressed a tender kiss to her mouth, hoping that quieted all her fears about not measuring up. There was nothing to measure up to, with McKenna occupying all of my brain space I couldn’t have recalled a previous partner if I tried.
We lay together as the room grew dark around us. Never in my life had I savored a quiet moment quite like this one. McKenna’s head rested on my shoulder, her tangled hair splayed on the pillow between us, and her warm, soft body molded to mine. A monogamous healthy sexual relationship was completely foreign to me. And knowing this beautiful, sweet girl trusted me made my heart beat erratically. She believed in me when no one else did. She saw the man I hoped I could become.
My brothers would be home soon and I knew we needed to get up and get dressed, I just didn’t want to. “Are you hungry?” I asked finally. We’d skipped dinner and gone straight for dessert. The least I could do now was feed her.
“Why, are you going to cook for me?” The hint of a smile tugged at her mouth.
